Well the anti-depressants helped lift my mood, but perhaps lifted me a bit too high. I feel so much more "up" than I've felt in a long time. There are side effects of course, and one of them is I have basically stopped crying. Now I know that you can't get a happy medium, but my grief has to go somewhere... I mean, it's not as if it just disappears, or is erased from my heart and mind. What happens when I stop taking the tablets? I miss Allan every single day, I think of him constantly. He's everywhere I go because I take him with me. Whether he's beside me I don't know, but I'd like to think so.