This is my second Christmas without Allan; he loved this time of year, I hate it. I'm heading to the cemetery tomorrow, see my brave and lovely man's final resting place. At this time of year I try to avoid social situations because it just doesn't feel right; not that it ever did. Allan's death has made me want to hide even more, and I'm not planning anything social until February, then it will be the anniversary of his dying, and well I won't want to be social then... Allan, I miss you every single day. I simply have to admit that the absence of your face, your voice, your smile is the most terrible thing I have ever had in my life. But the presence of your soul in my life was the most valuable and precious thing. Happy Christmas Allan xx You have been loved (and you still are!)