This was the day my new bed was to be delivered. I'd been up since goodness knows what time this morning, trying to get myself sorted before the delivery guys came. I did a foolish thing, I started to constantly think and debate with myself about whether I'd done the right thing, whether I was betraying my lovely Allan, in the end having to throw out the bed we shared. I have been very very tearful, so upset at the thought, and then when the bed arrived, once the guys were away, I have been crying and wailing and trying to resolve this thing in my mind, and my heart. "What would Allan want?" I keep asking myself. I hope he'd be thinking "It's only a bed! I know that I live in your heart and mind and no matter where you go, I'll be there; you only need to call me and I'll be there. I'm waiting for you my darling, and I will be there on that day when I can see you again." Oh how I wish that day was now!